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Monday, December 26, 2005


Oh, what a time of year!

Christmas came so quickly this year, and it left even quicker. It doesn't really mean as much to me anymore. Not because I can buy my own things now, and don't need to rely on the 25th of December to complete my Justice League action figure collection.* But because it becomes more and more clear every year that Christmas isn't about any type of togetherness. Maybe it is on an individual family basis. But on the whole -- and I know this is always said, and it's cliche at this point -- it's about giving and getting more stuff.

Today at Andrea's, it was Hell. Yes, I understand that this is when every store has major sales, but could we maybe pretend that we're human beings, and not simply buyers of stuff. It got so bad, a customer killed another customer over a tiny Santa ornament. And they did it WITH a tiny Santa ornament!

Sure, I was impressed for a second. Killing someone with an ornament is not easy, believe you me. But is that what Christmas has come to? Or, rather, if this is how it has always been, can we finally admit that and stop pretending it's about togetherness?

Maybe one of the best parts of Christmas for me is when some network decides to show the film A Christmas Story for 24 straight hours. This is fantastic, and, this year, my hat** goes off to TBS. Not many channels have the guts to show one movie nonstop for a full day. I respect that.

If you've never seen A Christmas Story, then I'm not sure I can quite consider you a whole person. It, in my mind, is the greatest Christmas movie ever made. Hands down. You always get those who want to say It's A Wonderful Life. I don't trust those people. That film is a bit sappy for my taste. See it once, then move on to something better. Like, for example, A Christmas Story. The greatest Christmas movie ever made. By humans.***

I have a number of favorite quotes and scenes in A Christmas Story, obviously, as you would expect from the greatest Christmas movie ever made. Here are a few.

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"Aunt Clara had for years not only perpetually labored under the delusion that I was 4 years old, but also a girl."

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"Only one thing in the world could've dragged me away from the soft glow of electric sex gleaming in the window."

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"My father worked in profanity the way other artists might work in oils or clay. It was his true medium, a master."

Truly, the greatest Christmas movie ever made. The reason is fairly simple. This IS the reality of Christmas in America. Especially in the midwest. Even though it is set a few years back, it's as relevent as ever. The look, the feel, the people; everything in this movie screams Christmas. REAL Christmas.

Besides that, it's just a damn entertaining movie. Maybe one of a few that you could actually watch for 24 straight hours and not end up hating.

If you haven't, see this movie. If you have, see it again. If you've already seen it again, gather together costumes and props and recreate the film in your basement. Like I did.

*Which I don't own and am not trying to collect...
**Were I wearing a hat.
***Humans, for the most part, will continue to dominate filmmaking for some time.


At 7:08 PM, Blogger Carrie said...

First off, I'm so glad you finally decided to post another entry. I was starting to chew on my keyboard in anticipation.

Secondly, I agree. A Christmas Story is definitely the best Christmas movie EVER and I missed it this year, too busy eating cheesecake, hmmmm.

At 7:51 PM, Blogger j said...

To everyone who txt'd me Merry Christmas, I sent back:
"Fa ra ra ra ra ra ra ra ra"

At 7:57 AM, Blogger Adammmmmm said...

That was the movie that taught me the F-word. Well my older brother taught it to me when I asked what he said that wasn't fudge.

At 10:48 AM, Blogger Luke said...

Hmm, never seen this movie. I do like "It's a Wonderful Life" though, namely because it was made about my home town.

At 6:03 PM, Blogger GrrlScientist said...

that is my favorite christmas movie, too. the first time i ever saw it, i nearly peed my pants from laughter when the bumkiss dogs ripped the turkey apart in the kitchen.

i also love that quote about the narrator's father's artistic use of profanity.

oh, and seeing the narrator's his baby brother, wrapped up in a million layers of fleece, fall down and unable to rise again was nearly as hysterical as the dogs with the turkey.

and i could go on and on about that film.

that entire film is magical; it did such a fabulous job capturing the wonder and the humor of real people (warts and all) during the holidays from a 10-year-old's point of view, without making any of them out to be villains.


you'll shoot your eye out!


At 4:00 AM, Blogger Michelle said...

Is A Christmas Story the one where the kid is narrating in an older man's voice, and part way through it, they have too many plugs in the extension socket thing and it blows up and turns out all the Christmas lights...cos if it is...that's a great movie!

At 6:00 AM, Anonymous A girl... said...

Having not seen the film, the first thing I thought of when I saw your first image was "You stole Deacon's Easter basket!"

At 10:35 AM, Blogger Lex said...

Best Christmas movie ever? "Die Hard." But "A Christmas Story" is a very close second.

At 12:41 PM, Blogger Brando said...

"Not a finger!"

I worried that TBS would Shawshank the movie for me by showing it so much, but A Christmas Story seems impervious to such rerun exhaustion.

At 10:00 PM, Blogger j said...


I too asked my older brother what he had said instead of fudge and learned the F-word as a result.

At 2:58 PM, Blogger Scott Alan Miller said...

Yes, but what is the best movie ever made by NON humans? Seems that you have left that critical question unanswered. Perhaps, "Santa Claus vs. The Martians" which, if you ever watch it, was clearly not made by any form of intelligence of which we are currently aware.

At 9:56 AM, Anonymous Online pharmacy reviews said...

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