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Friday, February 03, 2006

Oh, Neo Nazis...

Recently, a teenaged Neo-Nazi named Jacob Robida (aka DOUCHE) entered a Massachusetts gay bar, shooting two people and using a hatchet on a third. I don't like Neo-Nazis. In fact, you might even say I hate them.

But I want to understand them. I want to understand their motivation for believing and doing the things they believe and do. What's the reason for a Neo-Nazi to enter a gay bar? Oh, it just hit me.

This kid is totally gay!

Dude! You totally went into that gay bar! You're totally gay now! Yes you are! You didn't know that?? That's how it works! Haha, I can't believe you did that! You're so totally stupid! And now you're so totally gay! I'll bet you made out with guys, too...

Oh my god, you did!! No, that's not like a handshake to them! Oh my god, you totally made out with a bunch of dudes! You're like one big ball of gayness now! Soon you'll be calling everything fabulous and stuff. You're just thinking about feeling up big muscle-bound guys right now, aren't you?! You totally are! I mean, come on, look at your picture...

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Oh my god! You are totally gay!

...

Okay. That's enough. I don't want to make light of a very serious issue. But, since I don't condone violence of nearly any kind -- except, of course, against this guy -- the only way I know how to react to bad people is by making fun of them. And calling a Neo-Nazi who hates gays "gay" seems like a good way to get my frustration out.

Seriously, though, look at that photo again. That's the gayest kid I've ever seen! Talk about Gaylord McGayerton! Welcome to Gaytown, USA! Population: gay Neo-Nazi kid! Gaaaaaaaaaay!



EXCLUSIVE SPECIAL UPDATE
Thanks to an anonymous source, this photo of
the Neo-Nazi Jacob Rabida has just surfaced.
Compelling evidence, to say the least.
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More as it develops.

16 Comments:

At 3:54 AM, Blogger Bridge said...

Are you sure he's gay? I mean if he's gonna wander round with his eyes half closed like that, he might have just got lost.

This of course, combined with being a total asswipe. And having a silly little beard.

Ho ho ho.

 
At 10:54 AM, Blogger Lysander said...

Haha, I didn't notice that beard at first, wow. That's a pretty gay beard if you ask me.

 
At 10:07 PM, Blogger Katie said...

To each his own. So long as they don't go utterly crazy and kill a bunch of people. God, that's just sick.

 
At 8:58 AM, Blogger Nick said...

Bahahahhahaha. "I wanna take you to a gay bar, gay bar! And then shoot and stab you!"

Awesome post.

 
At 11:23 AM, Anonymous anycollegestudent said...

He seems to have lost weight in the 2nd photo. Go him

 
At 5:40 PM, Blogger Carrie said...

I think I just peed myself. Thanks.

 
At 7:04 PM, Blogger Syar said...

this term...big ball of gayness, I shall use that now, if you don't mind. thanks.

and btw, on a more bitter note, Mr Gaylord McGayerton has better legs than I do.

some people are just born lucky.

 
At 7:59 PM, Blogger geekdarling said...

It's always the closeted-gays-in-denial that cause so much trouble...

 
At 9:06 AM, Anonymous Big Bro said...

Hey... I think I was on that float. LOL

Seriously, my second thought when I heard about this, after "Holy shit," was "I bet he was a closet-case." It's scary how often being in the closet elicits rabid homophobia.

 
At 6:02 PM, Blogger Becky said...

i don't want to speak ill of the dead, but i just can't overlook the fact that that bitch stole my stilettos and my fringe thong.

 
At 11:18 PM, Blogger Miss Devylish said...

Ok.. that just ended my night laughing outloud.. that one rocked.. thank you!

 
At 9:00 PM, Anonymous Pierce said...

best blog ever

 
At 5:24 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

did you ever think that he just wanted to kill some gays so he thought a gay bar would be a place to find them so, you put one and one together. Its like if a terrorist wanted to kill an american would he just blow himself up on the street or would he go to the american embassy.

 
At 5:07 PM, Anonymous hatchetnigga said...

yah use all are bitchs thats my nigga and them faggets deserved it

 
At 1:06 PM, Anonymous buy kamagra said...

I was searching to something interesting and I found this poof.

 
At 10:06 AM, Anonymous Online pharmacy reviews said...

I don't know why people want to feel that they belong to a privilege group that they are superior to anyone else.

 

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